A guy reads Twilight by Stephenie Meyer (2009-2011)

TwilightGuys Report: Living With A TwilightMom



“To guys with girlfriends who are obsessive Twilighters, and think it’s crazy, just wait. Try living with an obsessive Twilight MOM.

Every day, I awaken to my mom sitting at the computer, rushing to check every website or blog for updates (forgetting her son’s breakfast). We have two or three copies of each book, some of them signed, others tattered, others always loaned out. My home has become a meeting place for her Twilight friends. I come in from school, and there they are, all gabbing about Edward and Jacob. And for hours, that’s most of what they talk about. Jacob and Edward. Edward and Jacob. Thank you mom, I’ll just have a microwave dinner…again. Imaginary boys are more important that little old George.

Let me remind you of one fact: my mom is not twenty two. She is forty three. Not old, but still…she’s gabbing with her friends about cute guys in books and the new movie coming and the latest vampire news *just like* almost every girl at school. I thought about conducting tests for mind-altering chemicals in our water. But it gets worse.

There is this girl at school who was coming over to my house. A gorgeous, sweet girl who is a genius at almost everything. So I was taking her over to my house. I was very happy about this. But we walk through the door, right into the middle of a Twilight meeting. She hears the name Edward, and bam! They have a new member to their club. And I again go to warm up my own microwave dinner, while *they* all sit and talk…without me.

So after this going on for quite a long time, and fearing the same to happen with every girl I ever bring near my mother, I decided it was time to grab one of the books and get reading. I nearly sent my mom into a heart attack when I grabbed her her signed one. Rule 1 in our house…do not touch mom’s singed copies. Those were touched by Stephenie Meyer once. She should have just kept them in a sterile chamber.

Anyway, I read the first one in about a day. Mom was thrilled. She had me on the second one the next day, and called all her Twilight friends. One of her sites every morning happened to be yours, so I got called a Twilight guy a million times after that. I finished the next one in 3 days. Right now, I’m onto the third book. And I have to admit, I love it.

Now, when I come in from school, I can join in along with them (except, of course, the cute guys thing. As if I care! I’m a guy. I usually do homework when they start that up, or go watch some sports…trying to keep some hold on my man card there har har). The best is, the girl I mentioned earlier comes sometimes, and when my mom’s friends are there it’s like a little club. So yay. I might get to know her more. Thanks to my Twilight Mom.

So I’m a Twilight guy now and proud of it.”

Submitted by George.

Thanks for the story George! This week’s TwilightGuy Reporters get a Runs With Vampires shirt from Twilightteez.com!



46 Responses

  1. Too funny… How cute is George?! They really are out there, it’s just taking a while to find them all! Thanks for sharing K.

  2. This is so great.
    For some reason I pictured Cali from Twilight Moms as the mother in the story. I don’t know how old her kids are, but she’s been everywhere. On the set, at the MTV Movie Awards, at signings. Everywhere, I tell ya!

    Haha. Thanks again Kaleb.
    You rock 🙂

  3. SA-weet!!!! that’s to cute. (kaleb!!!! you need to ask these guys if they wouldn’t mind if you posted their myspace or something!!!) that way we could tell them all how cute they are ourselves.) PLEASE!!!!!!!!!(I hate begging)

  4. Oh my gosh, hahha.

    I usually don’t comment on these ones. But, I loved your little, “trying to keep a hold on my man card … har har”

    Hhaha. But, reading twilight can just make that man card stronger. You know, *nudge nudge* The girl that you were talking about 😀

  5. OMG! George is so adorable and funny. I could just squeeze and hug. -smiles- I love when guys get ‘sucked’ into this world of Twilight. He’s so lucky too. When I go off about Twilight, my mother just nods her head and mutters that’s nice dear.

  6. This one is GREAT! One of my favourites, so far. I feel kind of sorry for George though, poor dude. But glad everything turned out AMAZING!

  7. UGH. You have a cool mom. My sister and I love Twilight. We even got my mom’s best friend to read Twilight. Yet my mom won’t. She says she is to busy, and doesn’t even seem to like when we talk about it. We are trying to get her to read the first one, because she is driving us to Chicago for the BD Concert series (hopefully, tickets come out in about 2 hours) *sigh*

  8. oh, I loved this story. its funny cause I definitely see some of the characteristics of his mom in myself and my friends.

  9. Those microwave dinners. how evil they are!
    Nice story, it warmed my heart a bit. I love it when guys write in and they actually know HOW to write.

  10. haha. sorry to hear that your mom left you to eat microwave dinner. but yay!!!! you read twilight! that would make all the tv dinners worth it i think.

  11. That was really cute!! George (if you ever see this) you are like the funniest guy EVA!! lol, :). I hope everything goes good with you and that girl!

  12. I wish my mom liked Twilight too.

    Yay George! When you can’t beat ’em, join ’em, and you simply can not beat Twilight.

  13. what a cute story! I wish my mom was more like that, she read the books but she doesn’t like Eddward!! (crazy i know!) and whenever i start talking about it, she’ll lecture me on the ‘cinderella complex’ (girls thinking they need to wait around to be “rescued”) *eye roll*
    anyway….nice story! i hope you get your girl!

  14. YAY for Twilight Guys!
    Now to convince my boyfriend to read it…hmmm….sneak pages of it in sports magazines?

  15. I think that it’s good that more guys are reading the book. The books don’t say: Girls Only!

  16. I practically fell off my chair laughing by the time I got to the part about how George took his mom’s signed copy to read! What an awesome story! =) I wish someone in my family would read the book… my sister keeps saying she’s too busy or needs to be reading actual literature for school, and my mom has shown no interest in the series.

    I loved “Trying to keep some hold on my man card there har har”
    Made me laugh sooo hard that’s what all my guy friends try to do when ever I say “That guy is soooo HOT!” they all ways say to me “please, I will leave if you start talking about “Hot” guys” they just crack me up some times I’m hoping they come on here I told them to and read twilight! If ya’ll do I love you guys! lol!

    I Love you too Kaleb!! lol!

  18. haha that’s awesome. I hope George picks up a few tips from Edward and manages to get the girl!

  19. wow, I wish all guys were like that! Any guy like that would be my Edward.:D My mom doesn’t understand. Actually, no one I know understands. They just roll their eyes whenever I start talking about it. If I could talk to a guy about twilight, that would be even better.

  20. I can *sort of* sympathize with you George. I’m definitely not a girly kind of girl, and I hate romances, but I kept hearing about Twilight, so I decided to pick it up to see what all the fuss was about. I read the book in one night. It was quite strange. Everyone teased me about it, but I ignored them and continued reading.

  21. He’s lucky, even if he says otherwise. My mom read Twilight, and hated it!!! (le gasp, how is it possible?!?!)

  22. LOL! This is me. . . except that my son is only 3 so it can’t be me but . . . IT IS SO ME! Love it!

  23. Whee! Yay! Go George!

    Better learn to make your own dinner, I guess. I totally understand the whole ‘cute boys’ thing, and that could go on for monthes.

    Not that I would know, or anything….:)

  24. i love twilight guys… if any guy read it in my school (and admitted to it, and wasnt my really weird ex-bf) i would definitely go out with them…

    alas… that has not happened yet…

  25. Yay George! Another guy who has enough sense to just read the books and give them a chance rather than scoff at them and get annoyed by them.

  26. I would totally go out with a guy who loves twilight!!! My best friends boyfriend started secretly reading Twilight and loves it.
    P.S. if you’re a guy who’s girlfriend really loves twilight get her Bella’s bracelet from twilighteez.com and i promise you she will love you 100x more than she already did.

  27. Awie,
    This is really cutee.
    haha. But then again it is quiet funny.
    But i love it.

  28. The Twilight curse- Every time you hear any of the names from the book you think of Twilight, or hear music that relates to it you think of Twilight, or when you’re up at night it’s all you think about…
    But still i’d rather live with the curse than have never read it.

  29. Cute story and I’m sure my own daughter can relate in a small way. Since May when I first picked up Twilight I have been in constant rotation of the books, while still reading another novel and keeping up with my every day life activities.
    So far I’ve read Twilight twice, New Moon and Eclipse three times.
    I got my friend to read Twilight and now she’s onto New Moon and my daughter is reading Twlight…she just called me at work a bit ago to tell me she finished chapter 4. LoL Uh oh…what am I starting?

  30. OMG! haha I was laughing SO hard when i read this, like on the verge of tears laughing so hard. Thanks George for the hilarious story. 😛

  31. hahaha this story was soo funny kinda reminded me of my mom and how much my brother hates when she reads twilight…

  32. Funny! The part about something in the water sounds like my dad. He is posotive that Stephanie Meyer is evil and that something in her books brainwashes the poor, inocent girls who read them. He has seriously thought about having me go to see someone about my obbsession.

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