(Posted by Kaleb Nation )

TwilightGuys Report: His Plan To Steal Twilight Backfired

December 17th, 2008 at 12:05 am by Kaleb Nation


Dear Twilight Guy,

I have to admit that I have a sad story to tell. Like many men, I too have fallen victim to the Twilight series.

My sister and mother are just about the biggest fans that you will find. They are definitely ‘twi-hards’. As a brother, it was my duty to annoy the heck out of my sister, and the most effective way to do this was to steal her Twilight books and hide them.

Only problem was my plan backfired. Instead of bothering her, she didn’t seem to notice or care. I started skimming through the book to see what exactly all the girls were so obsessed about, and finally I got to reading them.

I finished the entire series in a little under a week reading at night under the sheets. My sister found her books in my room and I got grounded. But I can now say that I am hooked. And I know how to be a better boyfriend. Twilight is one of the best books that I have read.”

Submitted by J

Thought you’d all like something to hold you over until my finals are finished 😀

Posted in TwilightGuys Report

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31 Responses

  1. Brittany

    Oh Well, At Least He Still Got To Know How Awesome Twilight!!

  2. Brittany

    *correction from above
    Oh Well, At Least He Still Got To Know How Awesome Twilight Is!!

  3. Alicia

    LOL serves him right! Why is it that most men treat the series like it’s their kryptonite?

  4. Nazneen

    Awwww. Poor Guy. But lucky one too. Welcome welcome! 😀

  5. Amanda

    Wait…your sister knows you like Twilight now…and she still got you GROUNDED?!?! Sorry but that’s really sucky of her. I would have just been thrilled that my brother was now a fan!

    And welcome to our world!!!

  6. Loony_Lovegood

    It’s been a while since we’ve had a twilightguys report! I almost forgot they existed… lol. Well, he should have had the courage to just ask to read the books, and then he wouldn’t have been grounded. It’s seriously not that bad for guys to read the books. I know a bunch of guys at my school who read them, and they’re more popular for the fact that they read the books.

  7. Rapunzel

    Welcome to the Twidom, J.
    I’m sure you’ll love it.

  8. Kaye

    Hahahaha. That’s awesome. xD

  9. Kelly Deneen

    hahaha! That is totally cute. 🙂

  10. Nicole

    Kaleb, I miss you. It’s my finals week as well and I was hoping on some Twilight Guy to help get me through. Good luck on your exams though.

    P.S. I’m a writer as well, I work with a pretty prominent Pennsylvania newspaper company and I’m also working on my first novel. Maybe we could talk sometime, writer to writer?

  11. Stephanie

    Awww! I miss the twilight guys report! You haven’t posted one in a while! I really liked this one. Thanks Kaleb! Good Luck on finals!!

  12. Brittany Mac

    Oh how cute! all guys should read twilight to become better bf’s.

    Ugh, i just have one more final tomorrow and i’m done…so I know how you feel right now. I hope you do really good on yours!

  13. priyanka

    that was not a sad story. i pretty much think that his sister would have noticed tho. good luck on finals.

  14. becky sue

    I think that you actually got off rather easy– I’d have MURDERED you if you stole MY Twilight. But I’m glad you got to read it!!

  15. priyanka

    almost all ofmy fiends have read twilight.it is soooo cool. a guy that i am close friends with now is on eclipse and he is getting me the bracelet jacob gets bella for a graduation present. how cool is that?!

  16. Claiborne


  17. Katie Beth

    Busted. 😀

  18. Bekah

    Awww, I miss your brand of comedy. It is the only thing that will stop the monotony of another week of school.

    YAY! Another guy gets sucked into our cult… I mean likes the books… lol.

    I still think the last one was great about that guy who proposed with Edward’s lines. I would totally be thrilled if a guy did that to me.

  19. Jaimie

    I’m so glad that there are still reports of guys succumbing to Twilight! I’ve been trying to convince one of my guy friends to read it with no luck.

    Good luck with finals Kaleb! I just finished with mine and they were brutal.

    BTW, what happened to his free twilight tee? Don’t these guys get some kind of reward for telling their stories? lol

  20. Kathy Anne

    Also off topic: Kaleb, will you have a poll about Taylor for the part of Jacob Black for New Moon? I would be unspeakably disappointed if they replace Taylor. (Like boycott-the-movie-disappointed!) Taylor was one of the best parts of the Twilight movie! Thanks.

  21. Cara

    I love these Twilight Guy Report stories. They are so fun to read. :]

  22. Jacque

    Oh Kaleb,
    I’ve missed Twilight Guys reports! This one was definitely awesome. I’m currently trying my hardest to convert some of my friends in to TwiGuys (I’m not being overly successful).

    and I’ve missed you! Having finished my three finals last week I completely sympathize with your need to take a break but I’ve been laid up in bed with the dreaded mono that seems to strike every college student at some point and having no Twilight Guy to catch up on has been depressing. Thanks for the Report, it will certainly help in holding me over. Good luck on those finals.

  23. TwilightGirl

    BEST STORY EVER!!! i knew it would teach boys to be better boyfriends!!!

  24. Sasha


  25. Shelby

    This is great… Stealing the books to annoy his sister, wow. Well, I don’t think I would care if they disappear, but I would have my brother punished. But, thankfully, I am an only child and the only person who might steal my books would be my boyfriend, but that would be so he could read them too. He’s on New Moon now…

    Atleast this guy liked the books! lol. Am I the only one who gets upset when people say “the twilight books aren’t good literature”, “they are the worst books ever!” or “Those books suck…they are a waste of time”. And half the time those people have never read a single word of them…. What does everyone else think?

  26. Elise


  27. Lucia

    Awww. I missed the Twilight Guy stories so much. You should post them much more often Kaleb!

    As for the guy, aww. It’s too bad he got grounded but I’m so glad he liked them! And now knows how to be a better bf! yay.

  28. (different) Alicia

    More guys should take this guy’s lead and read Twilight. He even admits that it’ll make him a better boyfriend! Bravo to him, and shame on all the guys who ever-so-ignorantly call Twilight “that vampire book.”

  29. kayp

    hahaahah this was funny. a guy who likes twilight is refreshing. [[unfortunately, i don’t have the pleasure of knowing any]] i hate it well not hate but [dislike] it when guys hear about it or you talk about it and they heave a sigh like they don’t care or think its stupid. its like, ‘c’mon guys!! tap into your feminine side’ hahahah iono

  30. Lauren

    We need more Twilight guys! Where are they? Or maybe all of them are too shy to let people know that they read Twilight or even the whole series..

    Well, J, it’s awesome that you read the series and enjoyed it! Welcome to Twi-World!! : )

  31. Tai game hanh dong

    Spot on with this write-up, I actually think this website needs so much more consideration. Ill probably be again to read more, thanks for that info.

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