A guy reads Twilight by Stephenie Meyer (2009-2011)

TwilightGuys Report: He Tried To Find Edward


I was walking the halls of my high school one day, and there was group of girls crowded and squealing by a locker. I knew most of these girls, so I decided to saunter over (very cooly might I add) to see what the commotion was.

I was within three feet of their little crowd, and all I could hear was:

“Ahhh, Edward’s been picked, EDWARD CULLEN’S BEEN PICKED!!!”

followed by some of the loudest screams I’ve ever heard these girls make. Then one of them said, “If only I could go out with him [Edward]….”

This was followed by sighs of agreement. This ticked me off…who was this new guy Edward, and who did he think he was (…come on it was natural guy instinct).

So me and my buddies decided to “find” this Edward. Word spread around, and later that day, Alicia, one of my friends, came walking towards me, so hauled over with laughter she could barely speak.

“Stephen–I–can’t–believe–that you thought—Edward [insert laughter here]–was a real–GUY”

She then walked away from me saying something about “too bad he isn’t.”

About a week later, my really close friend…who is a girl, Kendra introduced me to the Twilight series. Right now I’m reading Eclipse…and man is it good. Too all the dudes who haven’t read the series….you’re missing out on some amazing action..and “how to act on a date” material. ”

Submitted by Stephen

He gets a free t-shirt from TwilightTeez.com for his story!



47 Responses

  1. Hahaha! I’d laugh so hard if guys at my school ran around looking for Edward…lol! i don’t think i’d stop them either…i’d be too entertained… XD

  2. Yeah, if you DO ever find him, give us all a call!! Or maybe just me….. Yeah, I like the sound of that better: only tell me. 🙂

  3. haha WOW! Yes, like Becky Sue said, give US a call. =] Not just her!

    And yeah, Emmy-lou, I wish he did find him!

    haha We all need to all spread rumors of a new guy named Edward and that he’s suupppper hot at our schools and see how guys react. lol =] Poo guys… They’ll never know what hit them. Thanks for the idea, Stephen!

  4. its hilarious. just goes to show that guys are self concious and if a hotter guy comes into school they need to act on it and either welcome him into their group or find a way to demolish him. (or maybe even imitate him)

  5. haha that’s hilarious. i think soon there will be fewer guys trying to find out who edward is…..

    now, can someone actually just find a guy at my school who is hot and acts nice? all those guys seem to be hiding. haha.

  6. Hahaha…
    If I was a guy, I would have been embarrassed if a girl were to tell that I was jealous of a fictional character…

  7. Finally another guy realizes that Edward can help you figure out what girls want. I tried to tell my brother that reading Twilight would help him get girls…he doesn’t believe me.

  8. Oh man, this is by far the funniest story I’ve read. I’d go into laughing hysterics like that girl in the story if one of my guy friends tried to find Edward. I’m still laughing at the thought of it.

  9. lol! that was hilarious! i love these stoies….they’re great!

    ps: dear kaleb, why havnt u responded to my email??? its ok if u have been busy,i undertsand, but i just thought i would remind u…

  10. hahaha thats funny. if the any of the guys i knew asked me who edward was id laugh and try to convert them. good for u. i think guys who read twilight r really awesome 🙂

  11. lol!
    I would probably have let them look for Edward a while before telling them. It’d be interesting to see who they found that fit the bill…

    but Stephen, what were you planning to do to poor Edward if you found him?

  12. Yeah like Becky said:
    What were you planning on doing to Edward if you found him?? haha
    Oh when u find him can u give me a call please ;D j/k
    Omg, guys should like have a book cover for Twilight that says:
    Learn How to Act Like Edward haha

  13. Dude . . . it is okay. We’ve all been there. If you can somehow convince these girls you are Edawrd you’re Golden. And of not well at least try to act like Edward. After all “the manuals” (the saga books) are a complete how-to get girls guide. Good Luck.

  14. dude!!! that is sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
    haha i love it!!!

  15. hahaha…. that was so funny!!! though if i was Alicia, i would let you sourch for him, for a little while…

  16. OMG! hahaha…that is toooo funny! I would have died laughing if i ever saw that! Good question kelly. Stephen wut were u going 2 do 2 Edward if u found him??

  17. Lol!
    HaHa! This was just so FUNNY!
    Yeah and I wonder what he was going to do to Edward if he found him.


  18. Man, it’s really killing me not knowing what he was planning on doing once he found Edward. I’m really curious, lol.

  19. lmao awh poor guy!!

    many of my guys friends are jealous bout edward cullen. they wanna know what he has that they dont hah

    [= now see if every guy read this book we wouldnt have issues[=

  20. Kaleb-
    I have a copy of the Entertainment Weekly magazine that you are in and I don’t really need it, so if you would like I could send it to you in the mail. Just e-mail me and let me know.

  21. Haha, that ‘natural guy instinct’ is really full of jealousy. 🙂 I’m also curious of what you were going to do when you ‘found Edward’.

  22. Mmm. Twas a good day to be a Twilight fan.

    I officially attended my first Twilight party today. and it was incredibly fun..I made a “Team Jacob” shirt and everything..with the, “Does my being half-naked bother” quote on it and EVERYTHING.

    was a super blast, Kaleb. I fully encourage you to attend one. 🙂

  23. I don’t know why girls think that the Twilight series show Edward Cullen as the perfect guy. Who in their right mind would want a creepy stalker boyfriend without a personality?? And who would want to cuddle with a piece of stone slab every night? He’s a Gary Stu and Bella’s a Mary Sue.

  24. To Rory:

    I honestly don’t know how people can see Edward and Bella as Mary Sue characters. Mary Sues’ are characters that are seen as being too perfect w/o any flaws. And neither Bella or Edward comes close to not having flaws. Edward’s main flaw is exactly what you pointed out, he overreacts and he’s overprotective. And Bella, she can’t possibly be seen as a Mary Sue when she has soo many flaws that people actually get annoyed with her character. My mom has read the series, and she hates Bella because she sees Bella as obnoxious and as being an instigator of trouble. So as you can see, neither character is perfect. And not everyone does like Edward because he is seen by some people as being way too overprotective. Some girls on the other hand don’t mind that flaw. And Edward does have a personality. He’s charming, witty, and caring. But Kaleb’s already pointed out the reason that girls like Edward so much. The reason is because Edward values Bella more than he does himself and he puts her best interest before his own.

  25. haha hilariouss if i had met that guy i would probably date him lol 😀
    umm kalib i have a qestion about the chat and i didn’t know where to send it and i was to lazy to look…
    so im just gonna put it here…
    well u see i kind of wanted to see how long a nickname can be cause there was this guyy whoo had a reeeeaaaallyy longg onee (it was very annoying) soo i just wantedd to see andd when i pressed okay it got stuck and now i cant get on the chat 🙁 which is very not good jaja so i was wondering if you kneww wha ti can do….
    preeeeeeettyy pleeeeeaaseee(x1000) heeeeelppp meee!~!!

  26. lol i wish my bf would do that. it would be soo sweet. xD but no offense kaleb its taking awhile for you to update and at the rate your on it will take maybe over a year fro you to get to breaking dawn..

  27. i agree with alicia, too bad he isnt real… well he always will be in my mind! =] lol. hilarious!

  28. hmmm i think i made out what you said in that video clip. i think it was,”i know i’ve gotten hundreds of subscribers since my last video…..”

  29. Do you know what they meant by Edward has been picked? Oh and who do you think should have been picked for Edward in the movie?

  30. O-M-G!
    That is hilarious! I woudnt stop the guy I someone did that in my school!
    Oh man, I wish Edward was real btw if you see him tell him to BITE ME!
    ROFL! -sigh-

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