Some Guys Will Never Learn (III)

476 Responses

1. I counted nine O.o

2. i got 8, including using the wrong word, misspelling Stephenie (how dare he?!) and forgetting 2 hit the spacebar!

   the grammar mistakes were slapping me in the face too…i think i may have dropped IQ points reading that rubbish…

   also, i think he’s an idiot, because he has obviously read the book to be able to mention EDWARD, to know the authors name, etc…

   ps. did he seriously say “grow up”? seriously? LOL

3. I had a professional proofer check behind me and we say 9, but she was really wishing she could mark the grammer! LOL!
   -janet
   (a Twilight Mom)

4. I got about four… But his grammar is atrocious! I bet there are more but I couldn’t concentrate on the amount of spelling errors with Grammar that bad. I’m sort of a grammar freak =D

5. i counted 9. cant wait for you to read the next chapter!

6. 1. your
   2. thing
   3. uva
   4. inspire
   5. hhe
   6. anbyody
   7. Stephanie
   8. areal
   9. frist
   10. becuase
   11. Fial
   And also, this guy is an idiot if he dares to insult Edward. I’m gonna track him down and stone him with my hardcover copies of each book.
   <3 Emerson

7. omg. that was really bad to read. i found 4….that’s really sad. i tink his letter affected me too much!

8. 7 Spelling
   10 if including grammer

9. I found eleven spelling errors and they are:

   1. your = you are or you’re (Of course, k-god, you might call this a grammar error, but in reality this is considered a common spelling error. It’s also apparent that this is a spelling error, because this genius used and spelled you’re correctly later in the letter as both “you’re” and “yOU aRE”).
   2. thing = think
   3. uva = of a
   4. inspire = aspire (This one is particularly funny because I am shocked that this person used the word aspire correctly, albeit incorrectly spelled).
   5. hee = he
   6. anybyody = anybody
   7. Stephanie = Stephenie (I absolutely counted this because even though he used a traditional spelling, he was talking about a specific person and he spelled her name wrong. When people write my name as Ann, it makes me crazy).
   8. areal = a real
   9. becuase = because
   10. frist = first
   11. fial = fail

   It would be delightful to correct the grammar and clean up his prose.

   anne

10. i found 11!

11. I counted 8 because technically, “your” is a grammatical error and i’m not completly sure what context “uva” is used in.

12. Kaleb, I counted eleven, not including the plethora of grammer mistakes that made it nearly unintelligible. I feel so…konfoozled…how anyone can even bother doing this blows my mind. Besides, I really want a shirt =p lol. Love ya, KN!

13. It seemed to be around 9. Sometimes grammar and spelling mistakes collide, so I’m not sure what to do with those. And definite sacrilege for misspelling Stephenie.

14. I found 11 speeling mistakes XD

15. O.k. that was seriously classic! I counted 9 though. I want to go up to that guy and say you have nothing better to do than swear at somebody who actually is doing something with their life? Caleb you rock you have both a fan club and A HATE CLUB! You should be so proud! I’m part of the fan club, anyways GO TEAM ALICE!

16. Okay. Wow. I really could care less how many spelling mistakes he made, because I was laughing too hard to read. This guy isn’t as funny as the other one, but he is just as stupid. I appreciate you Kaleb! Way to go! Its nice to here a guy’s point of view. Heaven knows how many times I’ve just heard…” EHHHH!!!!!!! ITS Edward! I love him!”

    So keep it up. I’m glad you aren’t letting these doo-doo heads get to you. Not that you will ever read this……

17. oh wow, that made my day (it’s also rather sad) thanks for a good laugh, Kaleb! You know we love you, don’t listen to this guy. He’s just jealous.

    I’m not even going to try finding all the mistakes in that. It makes my head hurt just reading it.

    but if he dislikes you and the book so much, how did he find your site, know the author and a main character of the books, know it’s about vampires, and most importantly: bother to write about it?
    I think he might possibly be a Twilighter in disguise 🙂

18. wow! what a rude chicken!!!!

    i counted 8 mistakes 🙂

19. HAHA, I can’t believe he’s calling YOU stupid when he says things like “inspire to be like him…” and “…so cool as you think.”
    I mean, who does he think he is?

    But I found 10 mistakes. That was including “inspire” instead of “aspire”. I know he technically spelt it right, but it’s just as bad to butcher the usage.

    I love you Kaleb!!!! Don’t listen to cluck heads like D. or G.J.

    Nobody likes those kids.
    And everybody loves you!!!

    with love,
    Kathryn

20. I counted eight. But hey, I could be wrong. It looks like you are admired by so many amazing spellers! You know, by them sending you those (cluck-cluck) letters, they are just showing how much they truly care about the series and especially Edward 🙂 By the way, GJ and him need to learn some serious manners. One word describes the both of them: rude.

21. Haha! That was hilarious. Wow. I would really like to know how and why he found this site, and apparently read it too, if he hates Twilight so completely =P
    I would be angry that this guy is insulting Edward if it wasn’t so obvious that he’s just jealous. As it is, I can’t stop laughing XD

    I counted 9, including spelling Stephenie’s name wrong (*gasp!* how dare he!) …mAJOR fIAL…never heard that one before… apparently somebody not only needs to be taught how to spell, but how to use the “shift” key as well…roflmao!

22. Wow… um…. smart chicken? But not smart enough! He made 9 spelling mistakes on my count. Well, there were a few where I’m like: DOES THAT COUNT?!?!? I DON’T KNOW IF THAT COUNTS! So i might be wrong. I hope that farmer chops of that chicken’s stupid head… 😀

23. also, isn’t “uva” Spanish for grape? Perhaps he is insulting grapes as well as your site and Twilight…

    I read it again and I got 9 spelling errors, but I may have missed some. It was hard to read while I was laughing.

24. I can’t believe he misspelled Stephenie’s name wrong!!!! Anyways, I counted 8 spelling mistakes but I’m not sure if one of them counts or not. These kinds of posts are so entertaining. 🙂

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26. 9, i believe. not quite sure though, cause i was too busy being dumbfounded at this morons’ failure at insults. i mean, really. this guy is the epitome of epic “fial”

27. I got nine, including Stephenie’s name, “areal”, thing instead of think. This rude person really “fialed” at English class.

28. I counted 11 🙂

29. Okay, I honestly tried to count the spelling mistakes, but I couldn’t even make sence of what he was saying. That e-mail could not have been in English. What, did get half way through a sentence and then decide to start another one?

    Anyways, best guess: 9
    your — you’re
    thing — think
    uva — ? (sunscreen, anyone?)
    inspire — aspire
    hhe — he
    Stephanie — Stephenie
    areal — a real
    frist — first
    fial — fail

    btw, that last sentence should be “You are A major failURE.” (which, of corse, is a lie)

    His english teacher must be so proud…

30. I counted 9 spelling mistakes.

31. my guess is nine.

    who is that guy to say all that? he’s so not kool.
    and he will never get a girlfriend…ever! he’s a jerk. and i think that you are the coolest person ever kaleb. :]

32. 9

    That was entertaining. Thanks, D. :p

33. [A sentence by sentence breakdown of errors… or it’s 30 minutes left in the office till Happy Hour! I’ve added my comments in brackets and my changes to the sentences between “”. Let the hunting begin.]

    So first all I want to say is that you suck.

    [“So, first OF all, I want to say is”… wait, that’s a random “is”. Ow, my brain exploded. 3 errors here.]

    Why are you wasting your time on this (cluck-cluck) book? I know why. Because you (bawk-bawk) (cluck)s and your up here and all you do is read a stupid book and thing you are so cool.

    [Should be “(cluck)’s”… and your up here makes NO sense. Think not thing… another 3 errors]

    Well I tell you anybody can read a book and one (cluck-cluck)uva better one than…

    [Liz would say: “book; and one (cluck-cluck)uva better.” 1.]

    [unintelligible chicken scratches]

    and give me a (bawk)ing break. any guy like edward is a (bawk).

    [“Edward”. “Any”. Capital letters begin proper nouns, Yoda says. 2.]

    a total (bawk). If you inspire to be like him you are just a (bawk-bawk)head like hhe is idiot.

    [“Idiot” should have a comma before and capitalized when used in name-calling form. Also, it’s HE, not “hhe”. Unless he is stammering over email, in which case I would probably stop getting so worked up. 3.]

    anbyody can read a book stupid, you are not so cool as you think …

    [Liz: “Anybody (2) can read a book, Stupid, you are not as cool as you think”… Kaleb, is this guy possibly projecting his own feelings on others? I think so, in my completely unprofessional opinion. 4.]

    [farmer’s tractor rolls by]

    Is stephanie Meyer paying you to (bawk-bawk) out this (cluck-cluck)?
    [Stephenie (2).]

    2 Or what did your girlfriend or probably your mom make you and you’re too (bawk-bawk) to be areal guy? Grow up or …

    [Liz: Random number =1. “girlfriend, or probably”= 1. And bad syntax structure so 1. “a real”= 1]

    [cows moo in bored tones]

    so like I promised here are my directions for you if you even care…

    [God, I’m really worried about the American school system at this point. How did I get so lucky? Wow. “So”= 1. “promised, here are my directions for you”- (could be semi-colon)so 2. 3 total]

    1 take your site 2 shove it up your (bawk-bawk)ing (cluck-cluck) (becuase that is where all this (cluck-cluck) came from in the frist place) and 3 shut up and read a real vampire book […] yOU aRE mAJOR fIAL!

    [Oh MAN! This is awesome. I love the epic fail (or fial) at the end. Wow. Okay. Numbers should be “1.” or “1.)” so deduction for each= 3. Random typos for spelling= 3. Random parenthesis= 1. No semi-colons/commas between numbers= 2. tRYING tO tYPE lIKE tHIS= 4.]

    [farmer begins to wonder what to have for the Christmas Feast]
    D. (no last initial given)

    Liz’s grammatical error count is at 38, 34 if you don’t count the tYPING lIKE tHIS part. And I now have 10 minutes left, plus my boss just walked out. Sweet. This was totally worth it.

34. I got 8 if you count “uva” and “areal”.

    *sigh* he sounds like the guys on my bus. Most of the guys in my school probably sound like that, but I wouldn’t know because as honors students like me, the guys in my classes (while they’re not ashamed to cuss) actually are intelligent to a certain degree, and can express their opinions in real words with a clear point.

    Kaleb, why do some guys have to be this stupid? Why can’t they be more like you or Edward or Jacob?

35. I got 11!!

36. Oh gosh, nine or ten…this person is crazy. And delightfully funny. Thanks for sharing Kaleb!

37. OMC, I want to win a shirt but some of the spelling errors are borderline grammatical. I can’t tell how many there are!

    I think there are (9)nine(9).

    D, if you’re reading this, you’re depriving a village somewhere of it’s idiot. Why don’t you get off this site and go find it?

38. ha ha Kaleb! I think that there are nine!! “The cherry on top of a perfect sundae.” HA ha! I love that! What a clucking jerk! lol! ooo and Orietta “Depriving a village of it’s idiot,” you deserve a shirt just for saying that! Ha! Now I can’t stop laughing!

39. I counted 9. Don’t even get me started on the grammar!!

40. ah what a dumb a**.

41. Im pretty sure theres 9.

    This dude is seriously messed up, I mean everyone has a right to disagree but this is borderline insanity. And cursing like a sailor, like violence, is the path of those who can’t win a fight with their brains. The poor fellow must have ther worlds lowest IQ coupled with a bad case of clinical depression and maybe a serious ADHD and/or temper control issues as well. D if you’re reading this,

    GET HELP. ASAP.

    -Gabrielle

42. I counted 13. Lots of mistakes!!

43. I forgot to say that I personally think the image for this post is an insult to chickens. My grandma’s pet chicken Niha is waaaaaaaaaaaay smarter than that, and look at all the cool things chickens did on the muppet show! Kaleb, don’t use chickens for the header for these hatemails anymore, pleeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaasseeeeeeee??
    -Gab

44. Idiot. It’s aspire not inspire.

    He’s almost as bad as GJ.

45. I saw 10, unless capitalization counts. (the word idiot is either in the wrong place or supposed to be something else, like idiotic) If that doesn’t count as spelling, I saw 9, just like most of the rest, I think.
    So, 9 or 10.

46. i was going to guess but then i read everyones comments. 🙂
    i had started out with 7. re read and got 9. and then i saw that someone got 22!! so i must be a worse speller then i thought! oh well.
    why do these’s guys hate you? I think they must be intimidated…. i probably spelled that wrong… sorry!

47. I counted eleven spelling mistakes.

    You just have to love these people… they certainly have entertainment value. They’re good to laugh at.

    Hang in there, Kaleb. 😀

48. I caught 10!

    This kid should take a shot at using spell check.

49. That was (cluck)ing hysterical.

50. 1. your – you’re
    2. thing – think
    3. inspire – aspire
    4. hhe – he
    5. anbyody – anybody
    6. stephanie – Stephenie
    7. areal – a real
    8. becuase – because
    9. frist – first
    10. fIAL – fail

    Final count = 10.

    Thanks for the laughs, Kaleb! 😀