The song for this chapter is When They Came For Us by Shiny Toy Guns
[audio:https://twilightguy.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/whentheycameforus.mp3]
Surprisingly enough, the new web server switchover hasn’t happened yet, because I’m still here (or am I?). I think everything is under control for now, but there will most likely be at least 6 hours of downtime around the end of this week. This is not a bad thing, actually. We discovered the root of the problem is that I posted my author photos yesterday, which prompted multiple thousands of people to hit KalebNation.com all in the same hour and overload the servers. I don’t know about you, but there are some on this planet who are just too easily excited (not that I’m complaining 😀 ).
Before I begin this post I should probably warn everyone that I am extremely sleepy. In fact, just minutes ago I awoke suddenly and realized that I was not in bed, but was so tired I had fallen asleep at my desk. Now that you’ve been warned, you can’t blame me for whatever half-conscious things I write in this post. But for now: the second chapter of Breaking Dawn can wait no longer!
I found it hilarious that Edward’s shirt is on the floor the evening he is staying with Bella. What, does he just hang around with no shirt on anymore? Is he trying to pick up on some habits from Jacob Black or something? If anything, he could try that half-vest thing that Aladdin does. Even Scottie McMullet wears a scarf:
Some may laugh, but a 2-year-old vampire is quite a terrifying thought to me. I grew up in a house with four younger siblings, and have been through at least three two-year-olds that I can properly remember. If you’ve ever been around a toddler, you will know that temper tantrums come very often with no distinct pattern to their outbreak. Having a angry 2-year-old vampire would go something like this:
My younger sister: WAH.
Me: Here, take this toy.
Younger sister takes the toy, crumbles it into tiny shards, and throws the pieces at me like arrowheads.
Me, dodging: NO. Just watch television.
Younger sister picks up television, throws at ceiling and causes roof to cave in on me.
Me, gasping for life: NO. Are you hungry?
Younger sister: Actually, I’m thirsty. [looks at me]
Me: NOOOOOOoooooooooooo…
Now, imagine such mayhem and uncontrollable temper being set against an entire village that simply doesn’t have enough toys to make the baby happy. You would have quite a bit of mayhem going on, not even considering the fact that this demon child also happens to enjoy the taste of the villagers blood.
The wedding for Bella and Edward is beginning to loom: and that fateful day when Bella will be turned into a vampire gets closer and closer. I keep wondering what it would be like to be 18 forever. Eighteen for me wasn’t exactly as epic as people in the movies make it out to be, partially due to me living in the middle of nowhere without a car. But still, 21 or even older seems like a far better age to get stuck as a vampire, just because you’ve gotten to experience a lot more human things you’d miss out on if you were a vampire. Because no matter how horrible and dull anyone’s life is, humanity is something I’m sure will be missed at some time or another.
But then again, the difference with Bella and Edward is that they will have each other. I do wonder about them though. It seems so much that Bella thinks she can simply live with Edward and Edward alone, and she doesn’t need anyone else. When you’re in love it’s so easy to think that: why in the world would you want anyone different? What would really be wrong with getting a deserted island and just living there with the person you love, without ever having to deal with anyone else or the mundane problems of the world?
It might all be a wonderful fairytale ending, but no matter how much Bella and Edward love each other, at some point they will need others. Edward seems to understand this. But for Bella, a normal high-school girl, it will be hard at some point for her to never be able to go out with her friends, or to have to avoid all the people from her high school forever — even if she finally has Edward.
The next chapter is called Big Day. Keeping in mind the grand mix of werewolves, vampires — and oh yes, even some boring old humans — who will be in attendance, I can only imagine how this wedding business will go 😀
Question for the comments: If you were turned into a vampire, what age would you want to be stuck in (any age, past present or future)?
——NOTES——
– Thanks for all the help picking my author photo! I’m pretty sure there was a resounding vote for a certain one, but I’ll update when we have the final pick 😀
165 Responses
Hahahahha. Kaleb, your pictures always make me laugh. =D
About your question, I’ve always thought that Carlisle and Esme were changed at just the right ages–early 20’s–so I think that’s when I would want to be changed. I mean, by that time, you can do pretty much anything without having to exaggerate your age–drive, vote, get a decent job, ect. Haha, I’m really sleepy, too, so I have no idea if I just made any sense or not, and I’m too lazy to go back and try to make sense. =D
Can’t wait for your reaction on the next chapter! =]
Are u cwazy?? (as my 3 year old would say) I mean come on?? It’s about time he took his shirt off!! It’s the least he could do for the poor girl! He pitched a fit when she tried to unbutton her blouse for goodness sake. Most guys would kill for a girl so “willing.” I would surely hope that by the night before the wedding he would at least show her a little skin….(and no i’m not talking a bout Rob! Strictly Edward!!)lol And yes it was funny. Like he’s trying to keep up with the wolf boy… of sorts.
wow.. no commments yet? that’s weird… haha “Is he trying to pick up on some habits from Jacob Black or something?” ROFL..I was impressed also but because it wouldn’t have helped Bella’s self-control..still I guess if they made it that far… I loved his brothers going to Bella’s house to pick him up (though they might have seen something they didn’ want 2…just saying) and Bella asking if they were going to a strip-club.. and Jasper winking at her 😛 he just seems to always be so serious that it was nice… I don’t think Bella will miss having human experiences… and picking an age is tricky..being a teenager at the best of your youth and whatnot seems reasonable but at the same time you will be viewed as a child in a lot of situations.. mayb in your 20s would b a good age? every age has its pros and cons… and I couldn’t help myself and read the next chapter..aren’t you curious about the wedding:P? the wedding will go somehow how you’re imagining it but not quite..can’t wait 2 hear your thoughts!
Hmm… I suppose I’d like to be over 21. I’m not sure. In fact, I wouldn’t choose to be a vampire, I don’t think. Vampirism in Twilight seems to be such a pain and quite boring, and I like sleep. I would miss sleep too much, so, if I had an option, I would rather just stay human.
Very entertaining, as usual. I would like to make one correction. Scottie McMullet is wearing a SASH not a scarf (sorry that was really bothering me).
I would like to be stuck at age 666. Just saying. 😉
Way too tired to leave a decent comment.
Actually, I’m already stuck being seventeen forever. You see, I was in class on my seventeenth birthday, and at the precise time of my birth, the clock stopped! Therefore, I am officially seventeen forever as time stopped on my birthday.
Apart from that, nineteen to twenty-three would be good: young enough to pass for a teenager and go to high school and university; old enough to work and pass for an adult.
Oh sorry, and the question in question (yes laura i’m sleepy too) I don’t know, I’m the happiest i’ve ever been at 34, never knowing how much i would enjoy motherhood til I actually had kids, but I do have to say that the 10 years of marrage with no kids was absolutely wonderful so I guess that somewhere in the early 20’s would be a good place to be stuck. Young, free, not so many responsibilities, plenty of time for, um, intimacy…but i guess if ur a vampire, the world is ur oyster? (what was that about making sense???)
KALEB!
KALEB!
KALEB!!!!!
I just started listening to your music today. The Grave of Emry Hambric is absolutely stunning beautiful. The melody is happy and sad, uplifting and haunting. And I started thinking “What does this remind me of?” because I knew the mixture seemed familiar…
And I realized.
That is what Bella’s lullaby is supposed to be like.
And I had the brilliant idea that YOU should write your version of Bella’s lullaby! I am sure EVERY fan of yours and Twilight would die of happiness if you did that for us 🙂
So please please PLEASE write it!!!
Anyone else agree that they would love to hear his version of it?!??!
You better get some sleep!! Great post and I think if I were turned into a vampire I would want to be…in my early 20’s. Preferably 20 or 21. I wouldn’t need anything but the love of my eternal life but I would definitely miss being human at times. Being a vampire would only be bearable because of the same species vamp spouse. Having a vamp toddler would also keep one very busy.
I would prolly want to be stuck at age 21 because like you said you have experienced a lot. And, it just seems like a good age, not too old, mature enough to not be totally stupid, and not not too young.
<3 Josie
LOL. Scottie McMullet.
As for your question, I would sat about 22. I would hate to be 18 (how old I am now) forever. At least when you’re 22 you’re taken somewhat seriously.
Dang your popularity Kaleb!
I thought I was gonna be the first comment…but no. There now are like 11 comments before me! I just wanna be first once! Geez..
Lol mullets…I think you ARE very tired Kaleb. But it’s funny because I’m very tired too.
I can’t wait for you to read further!
Never mind…12 comments before me. *sigh*
Oh and yes! I totally agree with #9!!! PLEASE!!! It would be so good!
Oh, Scottie! How I adore your mullet of love! 🙂
For some reason 25 or 26 seem like solid ages to me. I mean, you’ve been doing stupid stuff since you were 21 and are now old enough to realize how stupid said stuff was and now [hopefully] really appreciate life and have some wonderful experiences under your belt.
I love reading what you think of the book! I can’t wait to hear what you think of what happens next!
About the question, I think that 21 is still too young to be changed into a vampire, since most 21 year olds are out still partying. I think I would like to be changed to a vampire in my late 20s, since by now I’m over the whole party scene and have experienced a lot more.
I think is kinda of funny you mentioned Bella and Edward living alone in a desert island… you’ll see why in about 2 or 3 chapters… lol
About your question… mmm… I have to admit I agreed whit Bella. I mean, she have everything she wants (at that particulary moment) it does’nt make any sense to wait any longer; so I guess, if I could have what Bella have at this moment, I would’nt mind to be change at 18 or 19, ‘Cause I would have everything I ever dream of
Future. 25, because that’s the age where you can truly do everything legally (rent a car for example).
i would want to be frozen at 18 but i guess it would be sad knowing you cant have anymore real birthdays, you cant experience everything that u always wanted to experience after uve turned 18
mcmullet haha
I dont know how u can read the books so “slowly” chapter by chapter, id be tempted to keep reading.
you know what, I always thought 17 would be the best age for me, it was my favorite so far.
but after reading your post Id have to agree Im 21 now i think it would be an awesome age to stop in time, like someone else said your old enough to do most things but still young enough to pass for a highschool student. and also in aust. most things are legal by 18/21.
Erm… I also just woke up with a start in a place other than my bed. It was the couch, at least. The funny part is that I was clutching my copy of Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them. It’s amazing how I manage to maintain a grip on books in my sleep, LOL.
So, as I’m as tired as everyone else, this post shall be boring. I agree with you about the two year old. My non-vampire two year old scares the crap outta me.
Also, you are one of few people that are concerned about Edward keeping his shirt on. We really wouldn’t mind if he managed to lose every shirt he’s ever had with no means to get any more. Yummmmmmmmmm.
I’m 25, and that seems plenty old enough for me. I can’t think of any experience that I need my humanity for at this point in my life, and would happily switch it in for vampirism this very day. I keep trying to convince the one vampire I have confirmed proof of, but he seems unwilling. 😉
I would want to be stuck at like 23/24. I say that because you are still young enough to pass for anywhere from about 20 to 26/27. Most of the time you don’t physically change much in that time period as a human. So you have plenty of time to have the “young” fun party phase, and you can still pass for old enough to have a career and be taken seriously. So that’s where I’d want to be.
I’m thinking that 23 would be a pretty fantabulous age….I’ve asked loads of people what age they liked the best, and that seems to be the general consensus. Not too old, but not young enough to be thought of as ‘too young’/irresponsible.
But last year (during my final EVER set of high school exams) I spent ten whole mintues in my Art History exam thinking how fabulous it would be to be a vampire (because I would have been able to remeber EVERYTHING I was taught) before I realised that I should have been writing my essay.
well im 22. and 22 is good enough for me. this is my fav age by far. i dont know why it just is. and i would want to be frozen at this time cuz 22 is over any age limits. u wont have to worrie. lmao…
i would like to add. as someone said, it be awsome if u wrote what u think bella’s lullaby is. (like ur own version)
Your chapter reviews are always the highlight of my days. . . well, of my nights I should say lol
I think I would want to be changed in my early 20’s (maybe 22 or 23?), but if I look around 20 at 17 or 18, that would be good too. =) I would want to be changed at this age, because I would have matured, but I still have that small right to act just a little childish from time to time. I say that right now, but when the vampire’s teeth are about to cut through my skin, I’ll more than likely have second thoughts, because there are so many human experiences left unexplored. Since you asked right now, I would stick with my answer. =)
Good question…I’m thinking along the same lines as Freya (#7). Quite a bit of human life experience up your sleeve, but still young enough to probably pass for late teens. Something to consider if you were a vampire and wanting to stay in any one place for a decent length of time. Mind you, I was still scared of everything at 23 and didn’t really feel as though anyone took me seriously until I was 30. But you wouldn’t want to look 30 with a 17yo husband though, would you?
Thanks for reminding me about shirtless Edward…gotta go back and review that bit again (and again…and again..)
My ideal age for transformation would be somewhere around 25. 29 tops. Many 25 year olds can still pass for high schoolers (just as the original cast of 90210) and yet don’t look out of place on a college campus or in a real career. Poor Edward looks so young that he can attain med degrees, but never practice. That would bug me to no end.
I think I wouldn’t be as quick as Bella to be changed at 18. I’d say 20 or 21 at least.
That’s a good question. I think that if I’d have met my own Edward at 18, I’d have wanted to stay 18 forever, like Bella. But as 18 wasn’t really a good age for me (and as I didn’t meet any beautiful and perfect 18yo vampire)…
Maybe between 20 and 25. It seems to be the best age : still looking young (at least, enough to go to high school for one or two years), but you are a bit more mature than when you were 18. You can also go to college, and even work (maybe not as lawyer or doctor, I admit).
Bahahah. Your posts are wonderul. Its currently about six fourty in the morning, but guess what? Im not tired at all, thanks to this post! haha. OKAY. Hm. If I had to be turned into a vampire, and got to choose the age.. I think I would have to choose somewhere between 19 and 22. Like a few people said already, I would look young enough for high school, but not still be a child.
I hope you enjoy the rest of Breaking Dawn, it is by far my favourite!
the latest comment i can see is 5.38am but its 11.42am in england so i guess it is round about quarter to 6 in the morning in america? i find that strange that we’re like living before you guys?
aaaanyway, sorry i often babble on about nothing really in particular 🙂
i would have to say that I would probably want to be changed into a vampire at about 18 as you can still go to school and uni and you can still work
also, you will be an adult but still have that teenage rebelliousness so you can have fun whilst trying not to suck the blood out of humans!
that’s a good question: if you were changed into a vampire, do you think you could and would you try to be a ‘vegetarian’ vampire?
Again, hope you enjoy the book and carry on with your hilarious posts!
xxxx
Hmm… what age would I like to be stuck at forever?
I really can’t say. I think it depends on my state in life. Like, at the current state of my mind, I’d really not like to be stuck. But maybe when things straighten out for me, *shrug*. In Bella’s situation, she’s deeply in love with this vampire and wants to be with him forever. So 18 was the right time for /her/.
But for me, I think I’m going to have to say early 20s. If I had the choice of when, that is. If a vampire (namely, a Cullen) jumped into my kitchen right now and said “Hello, Rachel. I want to change you into a vampire”. I, first of all, would be like “ZOMG THERE’S A VAMPIRE IN MY HOUSE!!!” but then would remember that I do want to be a vampire (if it’s in SM’s sense of the being) and that this opportunity would likely never pass again. And that if I said “ZOMG EW NO WAI!” I’d likely be that vampire’s breakfast.
hahahaha……….lol……..ur pics always leave me laughing hard……and oh puhleaseee!!!…its about time he was shirtless….that is the least he can do for bella………and the answer to the question…..i think carlisle and esme chenged at at the right time………..early twenties…….so even i say early twenties
i hope you enjoy the book and carry on with ur amazingly hilarious posts
hhhmmm in a way i supose i would like to be 18 (i’m 18 now) but i think in the end i would probebly go for 23. that is my perfect age. i think i would be mature enough to survive being a vampire without to many tantrums and well what a nice age really don’t u think? obviously as i’ve never been 23 the reality could be different but yes i think 23. And i agree with the ‘plz kaleb’ post that u should write a version of Bella’s Lulleby it would be very interesting. my favourate version is a river flows in you or well tbh i forgot it’s name i think that’s what it’s called.
I’ll be turning 18 in 3 days! So I can’t really say if I would want to be 18 forever…
I am 19 at the moment and I am married and I have a 2 year old babay boy. I thought the piece from Edna St.Vincent Millay in the very biggining (opening for Bella’s book)was very appropriate, because maturity is not at a certain age, but at a certain point in your life. That point was set to be 18, but that is rarley so.
an example is Kristen Stewart everyone that knows her says that she is mature beyond her years. So she is ready to be a vampire. When you reach that turning point, then I think you can make a fairly concious decision about whether or not you would like to live forever and leave behind the people you love(I dont know if alot of 40 year olds are ready for that decision.) SO there. Not at an age its at a turning point in your life that I think is a good time to decide about vampirism.
I’m actually really enjoying being a teenager. I’d have to say 16. I know it’s really young, and i’d probably change my mind every day, but we’re young and free and wild and i’d like it to stay that way.
I first of all wouldn’t want to be a vampire, it sounds terribly lonely and depressing. In the words of Dumbledore, who of course YOU wouldn’t know!! “Death is but the next great adventure.” Being human forever would be horrible.
If I had to pick an age, it would probably be early to mid 20’s. You are still young, but you could go either way and be either a teenager (ala 90210 or Tom Welling in Smallville, who when he was 23 was playing 16 years old), or be an adult.
btw the vampire toddler scares the crap out of me too. But only if the toddler was changed TO a vampire when they were that young. If they were a vamp to begin with… no, don’t try to figure out how that is possible. GAH get to reading so we don’t have to keep censoring ourselves!
But I can’t imagine turning a toddler into a vampire. It’s supposed to be like completely and totally excruciating, and inflicting that much pain into a 2 year old would be terrible and completely heartless.
ohmygawd. I mean living forever would be horrible. Being human forever wouldn’t be possible.
I think I would like to be 23.
I’d say by the time I was thirty, depending if I aged well or not.
I wouldn’t want people to think of me as 18 or even 21 forever. The older you look, the more respect you get. PLUS, no high school forever either.
Ohhhh I Would Probably Say 22…. Yeah 22 way too tired to right anything else. Lol.
I Think i might stop here so i dont spoil anything. Im half asleep it might happen.
Bye xx
i think i’d like to be the age i am now…23. i’ve experienced more in life, also i would NEVER want to be stuck repeating high school over and over. lol. once was plenty. now college, i could be stuck there for awhile
Forever 21 haha..if i had my way, i’d definitely wanna be a 15-yr-old forever cuz i can get away with being immature all the time 🙂
haha kaleb you’re in for a treat.
23… You’re young but not too young. And no high school then, although admittedly, it’s something to do. I think it would be difficult constantly finding things to fill your time.
Also, my daughter has the shirt that’s in the toddler vampire picture. It’s from Target.
I read your Twitter message too late. Lol, I saw that I was typing ‘twilight’ instead of ‘twitter. I think 21 is the perfect age. But, I’d like to be stuck in 12, like I am now (well, i’m not stuck). There’s a lot of credits you can get frmo being a young genius! Like, Edward. Just YOUNGER.