A guy reads Twilight by Stephenie Meyer (2009-2011)

Reading Breaking Dawn: Chapter 2 (Long Night)

The song for this chapter is When They Came For Us by Shiny Toy Guns

[audio:https://twilightguy.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/whentheycameforus.mp3]

Surprisingly enough, the new web server switchover hasn’t happened yet, because I’m still here (or am I?). I think everything is under control for now, but there will most likely be at least 6 hours of downtime around the end of this week. This is not a bad thing, actually. We discovered the root of the problem is that I posted my author photos yesterday, which prompted multiple thousands of people to hit KalebNation.com all in the same hour and overload the servers. I don’t know about you, but there are some on this planet who are just too easily excited (not that I’m complaining ๐Ÿ˜€ ).

Before I begin this post I should probably warn everyone that I am extremely sleepy. In fact, just minutes ago I awoke suddenly and realized that I was not in bed, but was so tired I had fallen asleep at my desk. Now that you’ve been warned, you can’t blame me for whatever half-conscious things I write in this post. But for now: the second chapter of Breaking Dawn can wait no longer!

I found it hilarious that Edward’s shirt is on the floor the evening he is staying with Bella. What, does he just hang around with no shirt on anymore? Is he trying to pick up on some habits from Jacob Black or something? If anything, he could try that half-vest thing that Aladdin does. Even Scottie McMullet wears a scarf:

Hiathur miss, yr dress is fallin off...
haithur miss, just fixing that dress of yrs

mullets

Some may laugh, but a 2-year-old vampire is quite a terrifying thought to me. I grew up in a house with four younger siblings, and have been through at least three two-year-olds that I can properly remember. If you’ve ever been around a toddler, you will know that temper tantrums come very often with no distinct pattern to their outbreak. Having a angry 2-year-old vampire would go something like this:

My younger sister: WAH.

Me: Here, take this toy.

Younger sister takes the toy, crumbles it into tiny shards, and throws the pieces at me like arrowheads.

Me, dodging: NO. Just watch television.

Younger sister picks up television, throws at ceiling and causes roof to cave in on me.

Me, gasping for life: NO. Are you hungry?

Younger sister: Actually, I’m thirsty. [looks at me]

Me: NOOOOOOoooooooooooo…

Now, imagine such mayhem and uncontrollable temper being set against an entire village that simply doesn’t have enough toys to make the baby happy. You would have quite a bit of mayhem going on, not even considering the fact that this demon child also happens to enjoy the taste of the villagers blood.

baby2

The wedding for Bella and Edward is beginning to loom: and that fateful day when Bella will be turned into a vampire gets closer and closer. I keep wondering what it would be like to be 18 forever. Eighteen for me wasn’t exactly as epic as people in the movies make it out to be, partially due to me living in the middle of nowhere without a car. But still, 21 or even older seems like a far better age to get stuck as a vampire, just because you’ve gotten to experience a lot more human things you’d miss out on if you were a vampire. Because no matter how horrible and dull anyone’s life is, humanity is something I’m sure will be missed at some time or another.

But then again, the difference with Bella and Edward is that they will have each other. I do wonder about them though. It seems so much that Bella thinks she can simply live with Edward and Edward alone, and she doesn’t need anyone else. When you’re in love it’s so easy to think that: why in the world would you want anyone different? What would really be wrong with getting a deserted island and just living there with the person you love, without ever having to deal with anyone else or the mundane problems of the world?

It might all be a wonderful fairytale ending, but no matter how much Bella and Edward love each other, at some point they will need others. Edward seems to understand this. But for Bella, a normal high-school girl, it will be hard at some point for her to never be able to go out with her friends, or to have to avoid all the people from her high school forever — even if she finally has Edward.

The next chapter is called Big Day. Keeping in mind the grand mix of werewolves, vampires — and oh yes, even some boring old humans — who will be in attendance, I can only imagine how this wedding business will go ๐Ÿ˜€

Question for the comments: If you were turned into a vampire, what age would you want to be stuck in (any age, past present or future)?

——NOTES——

– Thanks for all the help picking my author photo! I’m pretty sure there was a resounding vote for a certain one, but I’ll update when we have the final pick ๐Ÿ˜€

Share:

Facebook
Twitter
Pinterest
LinkedIn

165 Responses

  1. I think I wouldn’t mind being forever 21-25. I’m nearly 21 and life’s pretty good.

  2. Actually I like being a teenager but to stay 17 forever…I donยดt think I would stand this…. I think it depends on how you feel, how mature you are. I know people in the late 30ยดs and early 40ยดs and there sometimes much more like a child than me or my friends so… In my case I think something like 21. Not to old, not to young. Sometimes immature and sometimes really grown up ๐Ÿ˜‰
    But at whatever age s.o. is turned there always should be s.o. you love to share eternity with. So I donยดt think Bella will have any problems in being frozen at 18

  3. I have to go fast because I have class in a few minutes.

    Kaleb, his shirt is on the floor because they were, um, canoodling, and sometimes when people canoodle a lot, their clothes come off. Didn’t your mommy and daddy ever tell you about this?

    I loved the conversation with your baby vampire sister. That is quite frightening. My mom has a daycare and one day while I was there, one of the kids took a toy from a girl The girl completely lost it and chased her around the room, clawing for her eyeballs. I had to grab her so she wouldn’t kill the other child and I got my face scratched up so bad that I started to bleed. I shudder to think what would’ve happened if I had started to bleed AND that girl was a vampire.

    I think 23 to 25 would be a good age to be turned. You would have just enough human experiences, but you would still look young. But if I was Bella, I wouldn’t wait. I would be changed ASAP so there wouldn’t be a huge gap between me and Edward. I get her POV.

  4. I’m probably too old to post, but I’m gonna. I’m 39 and have 4 kids for Christ’s Sake! LOL! I just into the Twilight Saga after buying Twilight for my 13 yr old son at Xmas.

    OK- back on track- age of becoming a vampire. I vote 25-27 yrs old. Why? I was a young looking mid twenties gal, so you could pass for as young as 18 and as old as 30. You get to sow your human oats, get your fill of dance clubs, and establish some responsibility- KWIM?

    Anywhere over 35 is bad. The closer a lady gets to menopause, Wow! Watch out! LOL!

    Thanks for the site Kaleb (my 2nd son’s name BTW)! You have inspired my 13 yr old to not hide the fact that he reads Twilight!

  5. Yea! I was so happy when I saw the post!
    Ok… If I were to be turned into a vampire and be stuck at a certain age, I would choose to be… Hmmmmmm… probably 21 or 22. I want to have time to experience as much of human life that I can. Maybe if I was really in love, like Bella and Edward, I would maybe choose to be changed now at 18 also.

  6. I am 29 now and I actually had a bit of a breakdown when I turned 26. Something about not being 25 anymore really did me in. Now I am looking forward to 30, but if I had to be stuck at an age, I would want to be 25 forever. By then you are no longer looked on as the silly teenager but you are still young and vibrant. So, yeah, 25.

  7. I’d probably want to be 25. 18 wasn’t the best for me, I really didn’t see what others saw until my early 20’s. If you were turned at 18, you would be stuck going to high school for the rest of your life. Carlisle has it better with being able to be married, have a family and keep a job.

    But then again if the love of my life was eternally 17….that would be another story altogether.

  8. 25. i’m 23 now, but i wouldn’t want to stay at this age. something about being older seems to earn more respect. i don’t think i’d want to be young forever.

  9. i dunno. just a random question. why are all the comments labeled 1??

    im probably thinking 21, 22, or, 23.

    oh and kaleb, youre getting pretty close there with that island theory. are you suree youre not reading ahead??
    jk lol

  10. If I were a vampire, I would want to be stuck at…20. I don’t know? It just sounds like a good age…hehe ๐Ÿ™‚

  11. Oh, and by the way, I’m 14 now. I guess it would be easier to choose if I’d actually lived more of a life…

  12. I would want to be stuck at 21. I started cracking up though when I saw the thing about 4 younger siblings – I have 3 younger brothers and a younger sister and me and the youngest are 5 years apart. They act like little monsters I cant imagine if they actually were =0

  13. Well if I had to choose the age in which I would be turned into a vampire I definitely would not want to be a teenager (not my fondest memories), then my early twenties werenโ€™t so good either. I would have to say middle to late twenties. I am currently 27 and turning 28 later this year and the last couple of years have been the greatest.

  14. i’ve thought about this while reading the books. i happen to be right around the same spot as you in BD. i was horrified to read bella’s disgust @ ever being 30(in eclipse)…since i happened to have been reading that on my 30th bday.

    beyond that, based on the film’s representation of the characters: edward doesn’t look 17 anyhow.

    anyway, based on my own experiences, i would NEVER want to be stuck below the age of 25 or so. i don’t even take my friends that are under that age all that seriously. i guess being somewhere between 25 and 30 would be fine. although, i’m not sure that i’d want to be a immortal. on the one hand it would be great to have endless amounts of time study things…learn other languages, fields of study, travel everywhere, etc. i don’t like the idea of having no control over your own conclusion, though. the idea that after awhile you’d get tired of it all, but have no option to off yourself. hmm.

  15. The age I have liked the most so far is 29. So that doesn’t seem like a bad age, and I would be happy to never reach that dreaded 30! ๐Ÿ˜‰

  16. Being slightly older than most of your readers, (but still younger than a few!!!), I think my favorite year was when I was 23. But that really had nothing to do with my age, it was the events that happened that year. Does the number really matter? When I was 23, I was the same person as I was when I was 22 and 24. I’m the same person today at 25. The number is unimportant. Being 23 was my favorite year because I got married, got my first REAL job as a teacher and had my first classroom, bought my first house, etc. Now if I had done all those wonderful things at 18 or 38, that would probably be my favorite age or year. It’s not the age that makes life good or bad, it’s the events in that year. Maybe Bella wants to remain 17 because she was 17 when she met Edward and that’s her favorite time. But, that time has passed, she’s 18, and she’ll have other momentous years that will be even better than when she was 17.

  17. I’d love to be changed when I’m 21-25 years old. That’s when you can do things without the parents telling you NO.

    I don’t know how you can just read a chapter and then close the book. The suspense is always killing me!

  18. I’d want to be stuck in my early to mid-20s. No worries about silly schooling issues then, & pretty much total control of your life.

  19. I completely agree a two year old vampire would be terrifying. As for your question I would want to be 25 I think, its a good age. Not too old and not too young. Having a decent amount of human experience yet not showing that many signs of aging yet. You could pass for someone in their late teens through early thirties allowing a large range of time to remain in a job or particular place.

  20. im not really old enough to know what age i would want to be stuck at, but i kno i would not want it to be one where i would have to keep repeating high school again like the Cullen kids! ughhh

  21. I dont think i would really care what age i was as long as it was over 16. it would really suck to be turned and never be able to get ur drivers license. i think 17 or 18 or even 19 or 20 would be good

  22. 22, depending on how old I look.
    If I look too young, i’ll have to go to school over and over again. If I’m older I can do every job I want.

  23. Love Scottie McMullett – is that for real? Really love thirsty vampire toddler. Keep up the good work.

  24. hmm…
    well, I’m around the same age as Bella, so I can totally see her POV. Sometimes, I don’t think I’d mind too much if I was turned into a vampire right now (and got to spend forever with Edward Cullen =D). But, the rational part of my brain tells me that, really, I’d want to wait until after a few years of college. So, I have to agree with most everybody else; 20-something is the ideal age…

  25. I’m annoyed with your post :). So many people say that Bella will miss her friends and her family and that she is giving up her life for Edward (some people even go further and say this makes her a bad role model for girls). I think when this is said people are thinking of him or herself and not Bella. She doesn’t really have close friends or family. She has her parents but they both are fine without her (children leave home often around the age of 18). Bella is very self sufficient and LIKES being alone. She also didn’t get really close to any friend at Forks High School. Angela was the friend she was closest with and she hangs out with her once or twice outside of school. So I think Bella is perfectly happy to be with the Cullens for the rest of her human companions lives. Oh and there is always the telephone.

  26. don’t really wanna be a vampire becuase i’d feel restless all the time..no sleeping or eating..seriously?

    but if i don’t have a choice…i’d say 19-20.

  27. Comment # 68- Twilight Teacher (Erin) That is a great view of it! Really well thought out! ๐Ÿ™‚

    And I’d want to be………25 or so.

  28. ummmmm i really dunno, but if a really, badly want to be a vampire i’ll pick 25,( i’m actually 22 right now) i think that people become more mature at that age, maybe a little wiser even, and take better decisions. But if you take Bella’s case it seems kind of right her choice, some times i think of her as a mature and free spirit, she doesn’t think like a teenager ( although that she make some mistakes of her own age).

    It was so damn funny the picture of 2 year baby vampire. There’s a lot to come in the next chapters, so much going on, i want to see what your going to think about them

  29. I’d say 25, if I had to stay one age. Not too young, but not too old. But I think I’d get bored of living that long.

  30. Umm… I think I’d like to be like 23 or 24… its kind of young, but its like the perfect age.

    Though I think i wouldn’t choose to be turned into a vampire. Being human is grat ๐Ÿ˜€

  31. soooooo 23 it is! i had a hard time deciding but 23 seems right! not too young but old enough to not be asked for an ID but it could also be 25.
    since I am 19 but look 17… so at 23 I would look, 21…. lol

    anywhooo yes Edward is trying to show some skin finally!!! Learning from Jake lol

    =D had some laughs can’t wait for the next one!

  32. Love your comments again. I actually never thought of the fact that Edward had his shirt off he would be trying to be like Jacob. I just found it interesting considering he’d never done that before. You didn’t comment on Jasper & Emmett showing up. I found that funny & loved seeing Jasper being not so serious like he usually is.

    As for the question I think my present age of 24 would be good. You’re not too young that you couldn’t do anything, but not too old either.

  33. As always, you crack me up! I could tell you were sleepy! =)
    Anywho….
    I would wanna be turned into a vampire (by Jasper, preferably) at age 21. I will be 18 in 5 months, and frankly, turning 18 isn’t sounding as exciting as turning 21. After I have my big 21st birthday party in Vegas, I will have Jasper change me! LOL!

  34. If you were turned into a vampire, what age would you want to be stuck in (any age, past present or future)?

    I would like to turn into a vampire at 21. It would suck to be 18 forever because you’d still have to stick to your age and still couldn’t do things that you could if you’re 21, ie… clubs or drinking (just off the top of my head). So either 21 or perhaps 23 would be my forever age. (Yes, I know. Forever 21… hahaha…)

  35. i wouldn’t mind being 18 forever… why go for 21, because when you’re a vampire, i dont think alcohol is bvery appealing. I mean, what’s wrong with being a teenager for eternity? Legally an adult, but still a teen. the main advantages of being 21 are lost when you become a vamp. [and if you want to go clubbing, fakes ID’s work ;)]

  36. I have no idea… I’m only 13, so I don’t know what being older is like ๐Ÿ™‚

  37. To answer your question, probably 25. Good round number.

    And also, GET TO CHAPTER SEVEN ALREADY!!!

  38. I would like to stay 21-ish forever (if I absolutely had to live forever that is). I would be able to pass as young enough to be in high school (I am 16 and still get childrens menus for kids 10 and under handed to me at restaurants), and I could be old ebough to be in college and get a decent job when I’m done. I could stay in one place for quite some time, and wouldn’t have to move every 4-6 years like the Cullens. That means I could see any friends I happened to make for a little longer and, if I really pushed it, attend a 10-year reunion or two as a “27” year old.

  39. i wish i could be turned into a vampire in 4 years because then i would be 18 and 18 forever would be CRAZY!!

Leave a Reply

Related Posts

Funny Video: The Twihard Journey

I was sent this hilarious video by Christine Riccio. I love the mini history of every fandom freakout moment over all these years! Get ready